...for Soy

Every time Soy tries to recall her childhood, the only things she could remember are ropes, empty sacks, screams... The can of sardines that was supposed to be their lunch tipped over and fell in the sink. The nanny scolded her. She screamed at her being a useless child. She dragged her and her big brother Loy from the kitchen and threw them downstairs and dragged the two to the kids' bedroom underground. Tied her tiny hands and feet together and wrapped her inside an empty sack of rice. Her big brother on the other hand, who has nothing to do with the crime, had his neck tied up and was ready to be hanged. Brutal? Yes.

“Andy! Where are the kids? Did they eat already?” Sindoy, who was her father's cousin, called from the door.

“Yes. They already did!” The nanny answered back.

The little girl struggled inside the sack. Moved helplessly. But the noise she created resulted into a big blow from the nanny's paddle. She wanted to scream, but no words would come out of her mouth. All she could do was cry. Loy, however, got hold of a stick and gave their nanny a strike. He screamed loudly so that Sindoy could come to their aid. His plan worked.

Soy and Loy's parents, unfortunately, didn't believe what Sindoy told them. They didn't even notice why the kids' laughter couldn't anymore be heard throughout the house, which was very unusual. Soy became traumatized by the incident. Loy just kept quiet.

Days later, Andy took all the money she could steal from the house and ran away with a foreigner. Soy's parents regretted in not believing everything that Sindoy told them. But then, that really doesn't matter anymore.

Soy lived in a house just beside a lake. Every morning, usually at five, she and her cousins bathe there. The warm water and the fog created that mystical mood that made her forget things that have happened. Simply soaking makes her remember all the stories her father tells her before she sleeps, B'niteng, the spirit of the lake, would whisper in her ears and sometimes tickle her just to make her smile. Smeleng, the spirit of the woods, would hand her fruits whenever she's
hungry. Well, all of that exists only in her mind. She daydreams just to escape her memories.

When she was already in the age for school, her father enrolled her, together with Loy, in a city far from the lake. He believes that the education there would be worth the money he's giving. Soy never failed to repay her dad with good grades. But, every weekend, they would come back to the lake. They can't just leave the town because her father's livelihood is there. But then, when she arrives, her only escape would be the lake. Staring at it until sundown, draws the beautiful sunset, or just observing the fishermen keeps her away from remembering the times that she tried hard to forget.

In school, she joins as many organizations as she could so that she could be exempted in going back home to the lake. She succeeded in doing this. Years after, she would only go back home whenever she pleases to.

But then, this fear gave her so many bad effects. She wasn't able to practice the native musical instruments, she doesn't know who her cousins or even other family members anymore, and, she doesn't know now how to speak their native language. Her parents were very disappointed in this. But then, they couldn't tell her that because she's repaying
them with good grades and offering to them the awards she had received.

Unfortunately, this wasn't the only problem she had. She started hating her father. Her father who seems that he doesn't care for them. Her father who only visits them twice a week because of other obligations in his other family. Her father who, when visits, goes straight to their bedroom and watch television. This was the reason why her parents doesn't really know their daughter. Even though she's really good at school, she started having vices just like the other teens.

She lived in different worlds. Switching from time to time. Changing her masks to fit the world she's in. Her world in school. Her world with her friends. Her world with the Internet. Her world with her loved ones. Her world with her imagination. And her world with her fears. All too different from each other and never meets.

She was happy though. And she thinks that's what is important. Whenever she comes back to the lake or sees her father, she's not that bothered anymore. But she tries to learn everything that she had forgotten or establish a fresh new relationship with her half brothers and sisters. Even though now, she's too far away.




~a friend's biography...

really? thnx V.... ^^


i was having a hard time in writing this...... i mean, i have to really put the emotions and etcetera.... and to think that this isn't my biography... which makes it harder...

thnx for that V... ^^